WHAT’S GOOD FOR THE GOOSE.

Photo credit; Hot core.

Edited by: theunusual _writer.

A very littered face me I face you apartment in Ogbomosho. Plastic coke cans, minimie chin chins, and center fresh wraps littered everywhere, and people were too busy minding their businesses to notice. 10 year old Shomgbo ran out of the foul-smelling public pit latrine and into the house. She rushed to the one room she shared with her parents, giggling and bubbling with the excitement of a child. A child that she was. free, unbothered by the vicissitudes of life, and oblivious to what she might face. She wore the new Okrika gown her mother bought for her a few days ago and her mother’s heels. She was a fashionista and would try on different clothes and stand in the mirror, staring at herself. She wanted to be a model. She had the right collar bones, well-defined cheek bones, and bronze skin to accompany them.

"Iya! Iya! Look at me". She giggled as she stood in front of her mother, who, although she had a pensive look on her stressed-out face, managed a smile for the little fashionista. "Iya! You are not looking". Shomgbo wined and playfully removed the scarf that covered her mother’s face, and what she saw shook her. She wasn’t supposed to see that. But she did. Her mother’s left eye was swollen and reddish. Baba had disciplined her. Mummy, what happened to you? Did you fall?". Innocent Shomgbo asked. "No, my dear, I didn’t... You won’t understand Shomgbo. It’s life and men too".  "Life and men? What’s that all about, mummy?". "Take this and go and buy akara for breakfast quickly! ". Her mother ignored her question and shoved a 200 naira note into her palm.

And that wasn’t the only time Shomgbo had to see that; that wasn’t the only time her mother had dismissed her to buy akara or moi moi. Life and men. That was the answer to whatever the problem was. At least that was what her mother told her, and she believed it. Repeating it like a mantra.

"Look mummy! You have to tell me what’s happening to you! This is becoming too much". 15-year-old Shomgbo asked. She had grown from an aspiring model to a women's rights activist. Chuckles. Tough and audacious.

"Shomgbo, your father beats me up". Her mother confessed. "At every slightest word from my mouth, he says he detests me and that I’m nothing." Her mother broke down in tears. She had never witnessed her father do that. At least he was decent enough to keep everything down, but she had heard little screams at night.

Shomgbo rubbed her mother’s back silently as she took it all in. "But why does he do that?". 

"I don’t know, but he has another woman outside". "What? That can’t be true". Shomgbo said in disbelief.  "He does Shomgbo; I am very sure he does... I confronted him about it, and he said he does, and she keeps... She keeps him company and takes care of his needs". Her mother said it in between sobs. "Shomgbo I have lost your father to another woman’s sweetness just like that". No, Iya, you haven’t."

  "I have Shomgbo... My happiness has eluded me.".  "Iya! I think you should do the same and find another man who can take care of you and make you happy. All Baba causes you is pain and more pain". 

"God forbid! How can you say a thing like this, Shomgbo? I still love Bawo so much, and I can’t hurt him. He’s still my husband". At this point, Shomgbo’s blood had started to boil. "He’s hurting you, Iya, and...". "It’s fine… Gbogbo nkan a dara (everything will be fine)". She snapped. " wọn dara julọ(They better be)". 

You haven’t met Baba Shomgbo, and that’s because he’s always absent. Fat, sturdy Bawo. He had the appetite of a lion, not just for food but for women as well. He provided money for food, Shomgbo’s school fees, and rent, and that was all. It wasn’t always like this. When Shomgbo was born and way before that, he was a romantic Father Christmas. Cheerful, loving, and caring. Everything in a good man He possessed. Shomgbo grew up to meet a good man as her father, until one day Shomgbo and her mother stayed up late awaiting his arrival. He never showed up, and night after night, he didn't show up and when he finally showed his face, He was all about "Work being hectic". He was providing, wasn’t he? And soon the beating started. He would usually beat her when Shomgbo had gone out to play. Intentionally! Yes! It was his utmost pleasure to see her in pain and tears for something no one knows of. Perhaps the enemy of marriage had reared its ugly head.

Shomgbo didn’t just hate her father after all she heard. She detested men in general. She had vowed never to get married, but 10 years down the line, she was walking down the aisle with Tunde, her heartthrob. Smiling so widely and allowing the butterflies to swim rent-free in her belly Her eyes were twinkling with excitement. Tunde had promised her faithfulness and loyalty with his overly sugar-coated tongue.

A promise or a vow which seems stronger?

Shomgbo had done well for herself. She rose to become one of the most sought-after lawyers in Nigeria. strong-willed and audacious. She had slowly become my favorite personality. She had her honeymoon in the Seychelles and conceived Wunmi shortly after. After which she became a roll of bread. Fat and flabby.

"Babe! I’ll be going for a short business trip to Abuja. You know how these things work". Tunde said as he brought out his mini-bag from the wardrobe. Shomgbo wore a puzzled expression as she switched Wunmi to the other breast.

"I don’t understand you, Tunde! .. We were supposed to have a conversation about this, and here you are already packing." Tunde chuckled. "A conversation about my work? When did this start, eh Shomgbo". He hissed loudly. And just like that, Tunde was gone for weeks. Shomgbo did everything all by herself. And when he came back, he was as far away as Delta State from Sokoto.

Rule No. 1: Never go through your partner's phone. Premium tears and heart-ripping pain await you.

Rule No. 2: Too much let me just see can blind your eyes.

At 12am. Shomgbo decided to disobey the two rules. She sneakily stole Tunde’s phone and went to the bathroom to "just see," and what she saw broke her to pieces. He saw pictures of him on a vacation with a younger woman. She read chats until she could no longer read as tears had clouded her eyes. Was there anything she did wrong? She didn’t deny Tunde pleasure. Not one day! So what was it he was looking for? She made sure she prepared the best meals for him with fresh-chilled orange juice. Probably the juice wasn’t cold enough or the turkey was too spicy.

He had no excuse to cheat on her, and whatever it was he didn’t like, they could talk and figure things out like normal couples do. She left the bathroom an hour later, dropped the phone where she saw it, and lay next to him. She wasn’t going to confront him. She knew just what to do.

"Ohhhhh! What is it?". Tunde snapped. "You haven’t touched me in days. Ever since your trip". Tunde hissed loudly, "Look, Madam! I’m tired, and I don’t have time for this". And Shomgbo lay on the bed defeatedly dreading the woman that had stolen her husband. What was so special about her anyway?.

Rule No. 3: Do not pay evil for evil.

"Hey Tobi! Are you free tonight?". Shomgbo called a colleague of hers who had been hitting on her. "Sure! Dinner at my place?". "Oh! That would be nice". Shomgbo dressed up, feeling all young and girly. She left Wunmi in her friends care, and she was off to Dinner with Tobi.

See, I was there. Dinner with Tobi was more than a delight. He was so playful and young. And he can cook jollof rice too, with the right amount of salt, Maggi, pepper, thyme, and what have you. I didn’t eat it, but I wish I could have some. Touching his well-trimmed beard was Shomgbo’s favorite obsession.

Tunde didn’t have any. Chuckles. He insisted that beards were for children who were basking in the euphoria of puberty. How wrong he was!. Tobi and Shomgbo went on so many other dates and spent so much time together discussing law and love. A perfect match made in Heaven.

Sometimes you meet your perfect match shortly after you are married. How wrong am I on a scale of 1–10?

"Why do I smell a strange perfume on you, Shomgbo?". Tunde asked one evening. "A strange perfume? Well, you are never around. I got a new perfume". "Let me see it ". Tunde demanded. "I’m tired, Tunde; it’s far away inside one of my boxes". Shomgbo said she was covering herself with the duvet. "I’m talking to you!". Tunde shouted, dragging the duvet away from her body. She could see rage flashing in his eyes. But she wasn’t scared.

"Are you cheating on me, Shomgbo? Is there another man making you happy?". 

"Yes, Tunde, there’s another man". Shomgbo spoke matter-of-factly as she lay comfortably. "How dare you? You harlot!" Tunde shouted. "How dare you cheat on me? After all I have done for you?".

And that was Shomgbo’s cue to laugh.

"Mr. Goody too shoes! You think I am dumb. Have you forgotten that I have a second degree in psychology? I know you are cheating on me, Tunde, and I’ve known for the longest time". Shomgbo paused. "And here you are trying to point those filthy fingers of yours at me. You think you are the only one that likes the good life; you think you are the only one that wants to be happy?".

"Shut up! Can you hear yourself? I started sleeping around because you no longer gave me the pleasure I needed. All of a sudden, you became fat and shapeless. I didn’t even know what to do. I was starving, so I went out to get food. Real food!. You didn’t even make any attempt to lose all this baggage you call weight, and I couldn’t handle it. None of it!". 

"Oh my God! Did you talk to me about any of it? Did you say anything to me? Or you just packed your bag and went on vacation with that cheap girl. We were supposed to have a conversation about it, Tunde, but you chose to be a chicken".

"At least I have an excuse? What was yours, you harlot? I am a man, and I have needs. The least you could do is stay home and take very good care of Wunmi and be a responsible woman, but you choose to open your legs for another man, and you are not ashamed to say it".

"Look, Tunde, I did what I had to do to make myself happy. What’s good for the goose is also good for the gander. Good night!". 

THE END.

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